^^ haha...my mood is like a roller coaster now...LALALA...ya, i'm still waiting... =)
luvangel2003 believed today at 10:19 PM
Wo ke lian de shou is healing, very slowly, too slowly. OUCH!!! Pain!!! Haha, just now went for CO, can't play the ruan properly, cos of my injured hand. Well, but i fen dou anyway...and guess what? Now my left hand all the fingers (except the thumb) swells a lil bit, press the strings of the ruan, finger so pain. Just now I tried drawing and writing my diary (yet again...), can't write properly, ended up using my left hand to write my diary. My handwriting become like chicken feet like that. When is my hand going to heal ???!!!
luvangel2003 believed today at 12:35 AM
i had tried but it's of no use. next step: let go. painful but i have to do it sooner or later, anyway. can you help me? ask him to scold me or do something veri bad to me so that i will kinda give up or something? if i can't let go, the only method would be to make either of us angry or make bith of us angry with each other. i hope i can hate him, but i really can't do it!
luvangel2003 believed today at 4:28 AM
zzz...its 4.15 am now. Just now finally I had given up waiting, went to my bed, but I kept tossing and turning, can't get to sleep. So here I am, in front of the laptop again. Strange...I am supposed to be dead tired and wanna sleep the whole day after a camp. But how come the opposite happens now??? Sigh...wonder why I have to fall for a close to perfect guy, the one who seems uncaring and gives a one-word answer mostly when I ask him questions. First time I experienced it. My first crush...the first guy to ever make me cry (beside my brother). Sigh...again, I wonder why does hearts exist. If I have no heart, I won't be able to feel all the pain, all the heartbreaks. Then, I won't cry and waste so much of my tears. The other time I cried cos' I miss the person so badly. Now cos' of his cold treatment. My tears...are they worth it. Another perspective: Is he really worth it? Can somebody please tell me?????
I hope that my eyes are blind so that I won't be misled by appearances. Only then can I use my heart to measure a person, and not using my eyes.
luvangel2003 believed today at 4:14 AM
Hope is just like a glimmer of sun, it abruptly appeared and also, disappears when you are unaware of it. Waiting and waiting the whole night, ended up sleeping on the table beside the laptop. Sigh...why am I forever so immature and silly? He just ___________________....Why can't you just give up, silly girl???
luvangel2003 believed today at 2:07 AM
Back from CO camp. Overall, the camp was extremely SPLENDID!!! (except the chicken rice). My group consists of 9 people. We called ourselves the "feng nv". HAHA. We performed "Wei Shen Me" kiddy song for the night performance and got the CHAMP!!! HAHA. Ronale and his group performed the funeral performance, so scary!!! We just keep laughing and laughing, tiring ourselves out. At night, we went for nightwalk. Got blindfolded and led around the whole school compound. Wa, it was damn scary. This is the first time I felt the feeling of being blind for such a long time. Everything was just so indefinite, and you don't even know where you are stepping. The only person you can trust is only the person in front of you. But this camp really have bonded us together. Then after that, we went to play sparklers. 1st and 2nd stick of sparklers was all right. The 3rd and the 4th really caught me unaware. I used the lighter to light up the sparklers then I could feel the really strong burning sensation on my hand. It was damn hot and painful!!! Now my thumb and my forefingers are swollen. Ke lian de wo!!! It is still so painful...OUCCCCH!!! (wonder if I can escape doing GP essay by telling the teacher that my hand kena bbq-ed, can't write essay...HAHAHA). Then at midnight, we went to the track. Whole lot of girls, like around 6 people like that, with one Hao Sheng. We sat down at the track and was telling ghost stories!!! All the while, I was listening to my iPod. HAHA, clever right, I had brought my iPod. I can't hear anything that Hao Sheng was talking about. LALALA!!! Speed forward: Next day, have ex-co interview. Haha, I chose for the slacker position in CO...HEHE...Come back home, another surprise awaiting. He ___________________________________________ (up to you to imagine it)...HAHA...thanx, "he" ^^,Labels: FEEEL SsssSOOOOO HIIIIIGGGHHHHH
luvangel2003 believed today at 2:36 PM
thanx... ^^, short reply, but sweet...awww...i am intoxicated by love...lalala...cya!!!
luvangel2003 believed today at 1:52 AM
luvangel2003 believed today at 10:19 PM
Just now I went to perform at the Town Council Day, at the Tampines DBS, the empty lot beside the Tampines MRT. Wah, I got down the stage from the wrong side, so 'malu'!!! CO...CO...my only life in JC now. My aunt want me to quit CO and join other CCA like Maths Club or something. JC life is already so monotonous, ask me to join such a boring CCA. WAAAAHH!!!! That boredom is enough to kill me. I don't want to quit CO! All the sweet people, Jayne my 'niu nai', Wan Jia, Ming Xiu, Ke Yang, Xin Ying, Lee Kiang, Zhi Hui, Chi Ling, Huang Yi, ...Ronale (???) Ah ya, just love everything about CO now. It's the first time I feel so attached to a CCA. How can I let go of everything? Just when I feel like I have finished adapting to JC life, this comes. Sigh...why does life has to be so full of worries?
Haha...kor so good. Just now before performance, I asked him to help me hold my handphone, he thought my pants have no pockets, when actually I have (2 somemore!!!). Haha...so his pocket just now was holding 3 handphones (mine, Wan Jia's and Jayne's).
Then, he offered Guo lao shi a drink. I just randomly said "I also want!" (typical mei2 line). Didn't expect him to take 2 bottles and gave one of the bottles to me. ^^, thanx, kor!!!
See...my life in CO is so fun. I begin to miss CO people now. Never mind, going CO camp tomorrow. YOOHOO!!! ^^>
luvangel2003 believed today at 9:46 PM
My FAVOURITE uncle and aunt came. Well, I went out with them, left home at 6pm, got back home at 12.30 am. So tired...actually just now in the morning I felt quite sick. Yesterday I stayed up late until 2.30am, study bio. Then I woke up (my maid called me up at 12 pm), bathe, eat my lunch. Then guess what...I went back to sleep. My mind was very tired just now, unclear vision and got headache. Don't know why, I felt like vomiting but I can't. It's just the feeling of wanting to throw up. So today I just wasted most of my day sleeping. Gosh...it's been one day, still feeling sick now. I feel as if my life is ebbing away from me...
luvangel2003 believed today at 12:44 AM
luvangel2003 believed today at 10:36 PM
Went Changi Naval Base Open House just now.
Then Herman crashed his head onto a PUB box.
His head was bleeding and also,
swell until sooooo SWOLLEN!!!
Who ask him to keep touching his hair and
keep looking down when he walks?
HAHAHA...I am so EVIL.
Then my friend, the one living with me one.
(fail english 20+ %)
She went out for first date with a boyfriend she met in an online game,
went to watch Pirates.
I don't like Pirates, too violent and gory,
but she ignored me and went ahead to watch it.
Come home at about 10pm,
kena caught flirting near the letter box below the condo,
by...THE MAID!!!
Now getting scolded, I think...
oh just now, over already.
Now she is in the room alone,
just now my bro went in to look at her,
she told him to get out of the room.
ok my maid called me out
KFC CHICKEN
gosh i am hungry...
luvangel2003 believed today at 10:08 PM
and...at least xxxxxxxx notices me...^^,
at least now i noe i am nt transparent...
sth good abt today yeah!!!
another good thing...
i tink i gonna pass my maths fac test ^^,
luvangel2003 believed today at 10:17 PM
el 56
chi 46.1
maths 69.1
sci 67
geog 59.3
hist 52.6
lit 40.9
d n t 57.9
home econs 60
art 73.5
total %= 58.2%
...failed 2 subjects in sec 1.
...usually he will score 90++ for science and maths
wakaka...but i can see him taking after me.
got highest in art...
my artistic talent being passed onto him.
cheers ^^
maybe he should take arts course in the future
and be a designer...
so he wouldn't suffer like how i am suffering now...
omg...why i get so concerned about him suddenly???
luvangel2003 believed today at 10:07 PM
Feeling so desperate. Failed GP essay again, 19/50. Luckily, I passed my second faculty test, ECONS, 27/50. It's the second test in JC that I got a pass in ever since school reopens (first was chinese, surprisingly). Tomorrow maths faculty test. Hope I can pass, or at least get a 40%. I have been working so hard...sleeping at 2 am everyday to study. Life is hectic and boring now...sigh...I hate JC life. Beginning to regret following my mother's wish for me to get into a JC...but it's all too late now...URGH!!! Need to go back study my maths faculty test. Byebye...
luvangel2003 believed today at 10:44 PM
Really can't think clearly anymore. Just now, I just slept thru like...4 periods of lesson? Can;t get to sleep again last night, ended up sleeping at two plus. Who ask myslef to think and worry too much? Cen2 serve you right!!! Who ask you to be so dumb?
luvangel2003 believed today at 8:00 PM
Pls smile again...the way you used to...at least must smile at my efforts in making you smile, what... =(
luvangel2003 believed today at 11:30 PM
kok dia sedih...aku jadi pusing ya???dan tadi waktu kelihatan dia, perut aku jadi kayaknya ada air menggolak deh...aku pikir dia hanya satu2nya untukku, tapi ternyata aku telah melupakan dia...orang ke2...
luvangel2003 believed today at 11:18 PM
How long has it been since we last had a good talk with each other, feeling comfortable? It seems like eternity...6 months already, even longer than that, to be exact. Sigh...badly missing you. If you see this, contact me...email me or sms me. Our past...the separation...the hurt...suddenly memories of us began to flood my mind again. I am just too used to having you in my life. Without you, it just feels surprisingly empty...The time we spent together...a few years???
luvangel2003 believed today at 8:30 PM
luvangel2003 believed today at 8:57 PM
After all the separation,
Heartbreaks, rejections,
I still find love beautiful.
Be a part of the wonderful cycle
of love...and life.
Love requires us to hold on,
But life requires us to let go.
So live a life of love,
Hold on...
But let go when the time is right
^^,
luvangel2003 believed today at 8:53 PM
After all the separation,
heartbreaks, rejections,
I still find love beautiful.
Be a part of the wonderful cycle
of love...and life.
Love requires us to hold on,
But life requires us to let go.
So live a life of love,
Hold on...
But let go when the time is right
^^,
luvangel2003 believed today at 8:53 PM
In life, people come and people go.
But it is the impact that they have created,
that stays in our hearts forever.
That's how life works.
Separation makes us stronger,
just be grateful that you have met the person,
the person who has made your life more meaningful.
=))
luvangel2003 believed today at 10:39 PM
We tend to forget what we try to remember,
and remember what we try to forget
(especially the hurt...)
so just remember,
and one day you might forget the hurt,
but remember the person,
who is taken from you a little bit too soon.
Smile, fren ^^,
luvangel2003 believed today at 10:32 PM
Well...not really in the exact right mood to blog, but I am doing it anyway. Yesterday lots of things happened. College day, getting a new 'kor' and the chat with B. Kor very irritating, but ok la, he is actually quite nice. But veri angry with him lorh...he said yesterday that he pointed ****** finger at A after the college day has ended. What??? But he is actually only lying to me, just wanting to see my reaction. GRRRR... And at night (this morning, to be exact), I saw B online. Finally, have been waiting for B to appear. B was extremely caring towards me, so unlike A...********, telling me to *****, and asking me to **** ****...
~B~ i wanna to c you smile again just like before
luvangel2003 believed today at 4:05 PM
College day, to me it's screwed up. I just forgot how to play the song. Even the parts that i remember how to play...I ended up pressing the wrong note. See, I am such a failure, can go crazy just because of ONE PERSON. Ronale was damn DAMN irritating today. He is just SUPER DUPER irritating and....AH YA!!! And...my aunt is here in singapore, Jenn's mother. But I haven't seen her yet. Well, tomorrow thenn
luvangel2003 believed today at 1:19 AM
I can't give solutions to all of life's problems, doubts or fears.
But I can listen to you, and together we will search for answers.
I can't change your past with all its heartache and pain,
nor the future with its untold stories.
But I can be there now when you need me to care.
I can't stop your feet from stumbling.
I can only offer my hand that you may grasp it and not fall.
Your joys, triumphs, successes and happiness are not mine;
Yet I can share your share your laughter.
Your decision in life are not mine to make,
nor to judge;
I can only support you, encourage you, and help you when you ask.
I can't prevent you from falling away from friendship, from your values, from me.
I can only pray for you, talk to you and wait for you.
I can't give you boundaries which I have determined for you.
But I can give you the room to change, room to grow, room to be yourself.
I can't keep your heart from breaking and hurting.
But I can cry with you and help you pick up the pieces,
and put them back in place.
I can't tell you who you are.
I can only love you and be your friend. ^^,
-unknown-
luvangel2003 believed today at 10:48 PM
Hero
There's a hero
If you look inside your heart
You don't have to be afraid
Of what you are
There's an answer
If you reach into your soul
And the sorrow that you know
Will melt away
And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
And you'll finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you
It's a long road
When you face the world alone
No one reaches out a hand
For you to hold
You can find love
If you search within yourself
And the emptiness you felt
Will disappear
And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
And you'll finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you
Lord knows
Dreams are hard to follow
But don't let anyone
Tear them away
Hold on
There will be tomorrow
In time
You'll find the way
And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
And you'll finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you
luvangel2003 believed today at 10:44 PM
Never see _____ a few days already. Feeling so strange and empty. Why am I having this feeeling???
luvangel2003 believed today at 10:12 PM
My fren ****** is so pitiful, got sidecast-ed by her friends. Why must her classmates be so bad to her? She has already taken the first step to befriend them, but they just chose to ignore her. The world is so unfair, why must all the kind people get mistreated??? She tried talking to them, but they don't even bother about her. Sigh, actually I hope that I can be in the same class as her, so I can stick to her no matter what and continue being the anti-social gang in the class ^^, ...Those happy memories of the first three months in JC still stays deep within me... 07s08...
luvangel2003 believed today at 9:25 PM
Sorry...does not mean that you are forgotten. Thanx for being a friend, though it's been only for about a few weeks now. Listening to my chatters and "ren"-ing my irritating behavior is not easy, I know it. But thanx for being so patient with me and not blocking me, making __ look so "perfect"(??)...really appreciate it ^^,
--you should know that I'm talking about you
luvangel2003 believed today at 11:12 PM
Thanx my good frens...ying ling, yang qing, siying...for sticking to me no matter what...
Also, anti-social gang: Ming Xiu, Xin Yu and especially Hui Hoon for listening to my endless chatterings...
You for being able to drag me out of bed every morning...
Jenni for ignoring me and continuing to play audition...
Mostly, thank you _______ for your presence in my life ^^,
The hurt of rejection is great, but I think that time is able to heal all wounds.
luvangel2003 believed today at 11:03 PM
my bro's exam marks:
chinese fail, heard it's 20%...i heard...blame it on maple story addiction again...
luvangel2003 believed today at 10:50 PM
My bro almost failed his el exam, 57/100. See...blame him for not studying hard enough. Play Maple Story the whole day, think of it the whole day and I bet he also dream of it every night. Sec 1. I don't remember failing my English exam in Sec 1...Let's just see how much he got for the rest of his exams.
luvangel2003 believed today at 8:52 PM
aku kayaknya mulai lama makin berhasil. sebentar lagi aku akan bisa melupakan dia. dia begitu jahat padaku. mana mungkin aku nggak bisa lupain? orang yang membuatku menjatuhkan berapa banyak tetes air mata, orang yang sempat membuatku pusing berbulan-bulan, orang yang menyebabkan aku kehilangan pikiran sehatku...seseorang yang sangat SANGAT penting dalam hidupku. seseorang... tapi kalau hidupku bisa diputar balik, aku akan memilih untuk bertemu dia lagi, dilukai oleh dia lagi. bagaimanapun, itu kan baru namanya JATUH cinta, berarti perasaaannya cinta itu pedahal menyakitkan, perasaannya kayak jatuh dari suatu tempat yang tinggi ke dalam suatu lubang. for the sake of love, i am willing to get hurt all over again. y not? bagaimanapun, cinta yang membuat dunia berputar...
luvangel2003 believed today at 10:25 PM
am i really THAT transparent that nobody took any notice of me?
luvangel2003 believed today at 9:01 PM
Have been failing every of my tests...biology, maths, gp. Today just got back my chemistry test, fail again. So far, the only test that I got a pass in is only chinese. Really feeling like a failure. Academic, relationships...everything just starts falling apart so suddenly, ever since she walked out of my life--the day that my world has lost its sunlight...
luvangel2003 believed today at 8:39 PM
The man whispered, "God, speak to me." And a meadowlark sang. But the man did not hear.
Then the man yelled, "God, speak to me." Thunder rolled across the sky. But the man did not listen.
The man looked around and said, "God, show me a miracle." And, a life was born. But the man did not know.
So the man cried out in despair, "Touch me God, and let me know you are here." Whereupon, God reached down and touched the man. But, the man brushed the butterfly away and walked on.
So remember, don't miss out on a blessing because it isn't packaged the way that you expect. Take notice of the blessings around you. Have a good day, _______ ^^
luvangel2003 believed today at 8:22 PM
Don't care so much for me,
I may get used to it.
Don't come so near to me,
I may not be able to detach from it.
Don't put so much faith in me,
I may not be able to handle it.
Don't touch me the way you do,
I may not be able to get over it.
Don't become a part of my life,
Cos without you, I won't be able to live it.
Don't make me fall for you,
I may not be able to fall out of it.
Don't come into my life,
If you have to leave one day.
Don't give me the hope,
That it's forever you gonna stay.
Cos love is an emotion,
I won't be able to hide.
When love isn't reciprocated with love,
It hurts deep down inside.
Don's start something,
That I won't be able to end.
Don't make me believe,
That you can be more than a friend.
Cos at the end of it all,
I don't wanna hear you say,
That "I'm sorry,"
'but I never felt the same way!"
luvangel2003 believed today at 9:22 PM
Life in JC is horrible. I'd been failing every of my tests. So far, the only test that I got a pass in is only Chinese. The rest...fail. Studying is so tiring, I have to stay up until 1 am almost every night to finish my homework. Lectures, tutorials, homework, tests...monotonous life. I wondered what life I will lead now if I had opted to go to Poly or Arts College. It will be slacker than life in JC, I am sure. But my mum said that i must try to adapt to life in JC. She told mi to finish my 2 years in JC. If I still don't like studying, i can choose to go Poly or Arts College AFTER THE 2 YEARS IN JC. What's the use of wasting extra 2 years of my life? While he...still gives me the cold treatment. Never mind...Really looking forwards to June holiday. Although after the holiday there is common test. Made mental preparations that I will fail again and will get retained this year. Sigh...
luvangel2003 believed today at 9:40 PM
We got silver award for CO SYF!!! I kind of expected it, but I feel quite disappointed. So many hours of practice. Next concert will be on College Day, next Saturday, I think. Sigh, would have to use the ugly costume again.
Awards for SYF
Gold With Hounours HCI, TJC
Gold VJC, RJC, ACJC, NYJC, AJC
Silver TPJC, MJC, YJC, JJC, SAJC
Bronze PJC, IJC
if I am not wrong...sry if i made any mistakes
luvangel2003 believed today at 9:27 PM
CO practice time:
mon 4.30 to 9.00
wed 2.30 to 9.00
fri 2.30 to 9.00
sat
tue & thurs optional
luvangel2003 believed today at 3:51 PM
